I broke the vase -no,
Not broke it. Smashed it.
I smashed the vase against
The wall and danced barefooted
Over the glass, until the pool
Of blood made me fall
-Dammed, disgusting thing,
Viscous, putrid liquid tying me
To the walls of the hell in my brain,
Mushy barricades that stripped off,
Rubbed off my name, myself.
And he screams, and I don’t
Know who he is, or why
He thinks he can touch me,
Stop touching me! I kick,
He evades me, but
My bloody feet splatter
Him in red, a la Pollock,
Who ever that guy is -an
Uncle perhaps? And why
Will he not let me go?
I shriek, people finally come in,
But it is me whom they take,
Me whom they tie,
Him whom they ask as they
Wrapped my feet in white. I screech
Even harder. I remind all of them
About the nether part of their mothers.
My heart is throbbing fiercer in my head:
I feel I’m about to explode,
And I sing a fight song from a movie
I think I saw -or was I on a war?
Is this my combat? Is it my battle?
Talk to me you dammed bastards!
Talk to me…for there must
Be a me beyond the jail of my mind.
A me outside the carrousel I’m chained to.
A me who must escape, who can’t take it anymore
And no, I don’t have a freaking
Idea about what meds you think I should take
Or took. All I know is the rage that is ripping
Through me. I can almost see my muscles
Crack, my organs ignite because
He stopped me. I wanted to go out
And he kept muttering about the snow
And the cold and the boots I had not on my feet.
I needed to run, and he was boulder on the road.
I’m burning here, people. There is
A beehive in my head, cannot you
Understand? Why can’t anybody
Fucking comprehend I am dying here,
Inside my mind? I’m being shewed alive
By little monsters who look like coconuts
And a chimpanzee is smoking a cigar,
Laughing, as they drag me to a bodiless
Mouth of a thousand teeth! And he worries
About my feet, and the boots and the snow?
So, I broke the vase. No, not broke it.